He ate them! Ah Thank you, Mistress Doddsīut! One child, zeus, escaped and devised a plan To rescue his brothers and sisters! He tricked kronos into eating a rock And what did kronos do? Anyone? Any student?

The greek gods! Almighty titans of earth, sea, and sky! But even they were children once And they didn't have it easy! Their father, kronos, feared the day his children Would one day inherit the earth So what did he do? Anyone? Anyone? We were on this freaky field trip Freaky trip That's when this story should probably start We were geeking out on ancient greek At the New York metropolitan museum of art We stopped by all the statues And learned about the gods With Mister Brunner and my substitute, Mistress Dodds Hadn't done nothing wrong Wasn't rude Hadn't rebelled On the day it all went down The day I got expelled Look! I didn't wanna be a half-blood I didn't ask to be a hero seeking praise Being a half-blood, it's scary It mostly gets you killed in very nasty ways I didn't want to cause trouble, trouble I'm less a player and more the played And, honestly, I'd be totally be fine If I could make it to the next grade, next grade It wasn't dirty socks or my stepdad It was danger that I smelled The day it all went down The day I got expelled Maybe you don't know what a half-blood is Because your life is normal and happy And not constantly in danger, but my life? Let me set the scene 'Cause it's time you heard our side of the story It's time you heard our story You never listen to me You never listen You never listen to me You never listen, oh You never listen but Now, you're gonna listen

Yeah, the gods are real And they have kids And those kids have Issues Issuesĭaddy doesn't love me And mommy is a God Mommy can't protect me And daddy is a God Mommy is too busy And daddy is too busy Busy, busy, busy, busy being a God Yeah

The gods have godly things to do Godly places they need to see Godly plans they need to make That don't include Me The gods are real Like the greek gods Like the ones you learned about But weren't paying attention to Well, they don't pay attention to you, either Especially if you're their kid

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